People around here trust the shepherds, Jamie and the other Jamie. They always have the sheep trust to gather around. I'll throw another log on the fire. Turn it up just a touch goes another episode of the bog cast is starting now. brand new episode of the podcast starts now. Jamie bendele Jamie, Hernan Adam. Hey, we joined an interview with Paul virzi already in progress. I have very conflicted opinions about LeBron James. Now Me too. Oh, sure. I think everybody does. And there's some part of me that wants to root for him to lose every time. And then I think, is he maybe actually a good guy, and I just don't like the way he plays basketball. Yeah, I think you know, he definitely like that's the thing. It's like, he's a good fit like a good dude and a good father. But he's just been you got to understand something to LeBron James has been the guy since he's been in sixth grade. Right? Like he's been. Nobody's told him no, everywhere. He's gone. So but his entitlement like even the fact that he was like, going, what did he say recently? He goes, you know, whoever came up with this plan thinks should be fired. Why? Because you guys were injured and tired. Like, and you guys didn't play? Like it's almost like anything that goes against him. He's kind of a baby with but then you find out like, he's a good dude and a good father. So to Jamie, I totally get that with you. Man. I get into arguments with people. You know about him all the time. Yeah, I get the feeling he thinks he is the MBA right now. Well, at the same time, I think he probably is an okay guy. But he's got a is Yeah, I see. Exactly. You're saying he should invite me to hang out with him sometime. So I could sort it out. Right? to hang out with the whole How could you how super generous, you think he's a cool guy? Look, I think rarely are the guys that achieve that level of success as any. Right? They just I think it's harder to be consistently a bad guy over time than it is to be a good guy over time. What about curry? Do you think curry would be a fun guy to hang out with? He'd be my hurt. Yeah, yeah, I heard he's, I know, somebody that knows. like curry is like, I think really, like super cool. And like down to earth and fun. You know, I know somebody who met Yeah. And he was just so cool. Like, easy going. Yeah, I think LeBron would be I think of LeBron, like you. I think it's one of those things where like, if he clicked with you, it would be great. But I also could feel because he does think that you could tell though, even though he's a he does, he's got a little arrogance. But they all have a little bit, right. Jordan is that was the biggest? Yeah, Jordan was a dip. But you kind of have to be a little bit. You can't be like that globally iconic. And be like, without a little I mean, unless I don't know. I mean, I feel like I would so let's say, hypothetically, let's go we'll create a hyper hypothetical situation. You're out. You have the opportunity. You're out with whomever you run into whoever lebrons out with that night is his guys. Yep. Do you feel like the price of admission into the group is figuring out who in his group? It's okay. To make fun of? Oh, wow, that's interesting. But there's a turtle in the group, if you will, from the entourage, right. Yeah, but I don't know. But I think you have to read a guy's group to go Who? Okay, guy. Break balls of who's the turtle? Yeah. Because and that's a tricky one. Because when it's just on a one night basis, like when it's one off, right, this is a one off. You don't know if the guy that normally is the guy you can go at is either just being quiet, like not around and then you think that it's one guy, and you start talking some shit. And then all of a sudden, they're like, Whoa, whoa, whoa. And now you're like pletely black, you're like, Well, no, no, no, that that's, that guy's in the bathroom right now. You can't do it to this guy. Well, that's a huge jerk. Right? But well, but that but so we've all been in that circumstance, right? where you're like, you're picking the guy to be like, All right, I'm gonna go with this guy, right? Yeah. And if you guess wrong, you are never in Yeah, no, then you're out and the guy might even like get a little sometimes that guy doesn't like it either. Like he's just like, hold on a second. These guys make fun of me. You think you can come and hang out with us one night and make fun of me. But if you pick the right guy, oh, yeah, the rest of the group supports it. Yeah, you're in though you're in for good and you'd be like, how'd you get in with LeBron? And to be like, I pick the right guy, right? Pick the turtles like a scratch. You know how arrogant though? Do you have to be to get that chance? And that's where your mind goes. Exactly. I would just be so psyched to be just drinking with these guys. I'm not going to be the asshole going alright, who am I hitting? Like, the ego and falls on that person, which is would be astounding. I think the well, though is to is to pick one of the guys and challenge them to a dance off. No, it isn't. No, it is absolutely. Because you never know cuz you challenge them to dance off one, they may appreciate just the humor that and say, Come on and we need someone who's willing to walk up to a dance off, right? And you become okay. Okay, so wait a minute, that's a reach. I'm gonna tell you right now that's 100% error. You know why? Because you're forever in lebrons group as crazy dance off guy. Oh, so now you're never able to enjoy your night out. You have to go out and be like, amusement. dance off. The Joker like if it now it is true that if they find themselves in a situation where someone challenges the group to a dance off, they're bringing you there. I mean, they need to keep you around in case there's another dance off town. Do you live in 1950s musicals. It's interesting. I mean, it's that could be nice. musicals that could be 90s movie, a very person. So chimney sweeps, they all don't all get together and dance, they want to be valuable. And stay in that group, you have to be able to number one, you have to be able to look like a nerd and be able to transform yourself to to the hot girl, right? You need to be able to like take the hair out and walk slowly down the stairs. And and be able to find yourself in in. Okay, there. I'm with you. When you take off the glasses, you drop the hair and you're suddenly go from this Jamie, the guy who's talking and ruining this. Paul, and I apologize. You're having to listen to this kind of session. But it's good that you know with the other Jamie, before we get started. Yeah. The you're you're saying that somewhere in lebrons group. There is a person who has a secret identity that's based on glasses removal and hair Shakedown. Yeah, well, I mean, if they want to stay in the group, that's there's someone in that group who realizes that any moment they may have to pull out the Oh, I'm not actually who you think I am. I don't think you know how groups work. I think that's heavy. Our guest just said that's interesting. Are we all just kind of pretending to be something else? We're worried about becoming found out that we're all nerds with our air down? I don't know. I don't think LeBron James has many people in that circle or group that like would kind of combat anything that he wanted done. Oh, no. Like, you know, I think that it's kind of like a bunch of Yes, men. I'm sure he likes these guys. But you know, it's just all like pro like, I don't see any of them really breaking his balls a lot at all. It could be that first, maybe LeBron would do the dance off and he'd be terrible guys would all be like, Oh, no, no, no. So hold on a second. I actually I'm gonna we're gonna show to start. No, I was somewhere in the show. Okay. Oh, we're gonna start the show. Now. I I actually think you raise an interesting point. Paul, I actually think the key to long term success is always having a person who is able to put you back in your place that's not your spouse. You got to have somebody who's able to to give you a correction. Do you think there's a guy in lebrons Circle who is corrector there is somebody who has who has the ability to say things say them in a way do something different keep him grounded keep him away where you're you know, how funny would it be if we were all wrong? And he was like the weak link and we just showed up to a bar and like nice hairline fish and like salt pour it on there here's through the year that like we're sitting there with a Corona all confused like sitting there with this is the prom the turtle the most. The most assertive he is in his life is on the court. Yes. Otherwise, he's like I just I've never been able to pull it off off the go all his buddies. Why are you so good on the court is because he's actually compensating for all the abuse he takes everywhere. Right? He wants to interject in a conversation easy. LeBron will come to you We're ready. Can you just choose it for me big fella? Right yeah. Thank you. Yeah, put it on my tap. Yeah, right. No, your tap. Yeah. That's a drink on your tap. Right. To funny. Alright, so Paul, so this is this is the vodcast I am Jamie bendele. Jamie Hearn and Adam Haig are the other hosts of the show. You host 73 different podcasts. No, I actually cut it down to two, I do the verzi effect podcast, which I've been doing for a really long time, except like, once the pandemic happened, and I built a studio in the home, that's when I was really like, I'm not gonna say I didn't take it seriously. But it was kind of just like an audio podcast, I would talk to the fans that came out to see me show, tell some stories to support the movie stuff and then be added there. But once like this happened, this craziness that we all just went through. I was like, Alright, man, let's let's really build a studio. Let's get it on YouTube, we'll do the zooms with gifts, or whatever, got a producer. So this is kind of like the verzi effect. 2.0, if you will, and it just kind of really revamped and then I co host one with Bill Burr. We've talked about doing one for a really long time. And finally during this he hit me up and was like, Hey, man, like, cuz we would talk on the phone for like an hour. Like, we would just say I'll do how creative a podcast that'd be. So then we ended up coming up with anything better podcasts, which we've done now for about four months, which is going great sports, kind of like what we just did, but also regular life stuff, too. So I have those two. And that's kind of it for now. No more gun to your head. gun to your head was just put on hold. It was kind of like a season where I had a bunch of people do that. And we might revisit it. But right now I'm just building these building the YouTube stuff. Yeah. Ray concept, though, right? Yes, it was, it was a lot of fun. Because when you just came up with a choice like that, right? Like, like we just talked about right before it was like art, if you guys could hang out with LeBron James and his crew, or you could hang out with and then let's just say either Jordan, his crew, Steph Curry and his crew gun to your head you got one night, you're going to be with the guys for five hours drinking? And who would you and then we would just break down why. And it was really a good conversation. But it could be food. It could be anything. It could be like, you know, whether it would be sports or real life and stuff. Would you rather be locked in a room with an anaconda snake? Or just a hungry bear? And you got to just hang in there for a couple hours? Like what would you rather and we would just argue it and it was hilarious. So it will probably come back or definitely be in a segment on another podcast. What was the most surprising choice that didn't go the way you thought it would? Oh, the most surprising one that I'm trying to think there was one where well, there was one Alright, this is alright. So you have a family. You're a community guy. Okay, you everybody in the community knows you who loves you and your kids. You're a good dude. You're a good father. gun to your head. Would you rather be caught cheating on your wife and everybody in the community and everybody knows that. whispering that you said it was like that? Yeah. Yeah, man. I don't want to laugh. The funniest part about this is I'm in my 11 year old son. Yeah. I'm literally staring at like a stormtrooper helmet. And, or, okay, so you get caught cheating. You show up to all the sports games, they whisper or you don't get caught cheating, but you get caught, like masturbating in your car and like a parking lot during the day. Right? So you're just hanging so you're about to go into Kohl's or target you only pick one. You can only pick one. So either. You're caught in either so now they're either whispering to each other. I heard he was like playing with stuff in the car and apart. And then there's all that going on or that guy lost his family was cheating on us. So so. And for me, it was for me, it was easy. For me. It was an easy one for me. I said I would 100% be rather be called cheating on my wife because you don't know if we had marital problems. You don't know if she was doing with them. You don't know what was going on in a marriage. So at least Yeah, there may be mutterings of that people talking. But that happens. The you know, but one one, I guess was like, No, I'm not trying to get caught, you know, like a parking lot of Park. And I'm like, Dude, what do you like three o'clock in the afternoon? Number one, what do you that's just the worst way to go to your daughter or son's basketball game and have people in the bleachers whispering about that. So I get a kick. I have to tell you, I get a kick out of so when you ask the question in a very specific, but also open ended way. Right. It allows you to create the scenario that's most favorable to you. Right, right. So when you say like three o'clock in the afternoon, three o'clock in the afternoon. I got busted in the parking lot at midnight. Like there was nobody there. I was completely by myself. Yeah. And they're also in the strip club at that target. But come on. I got calls in the dressing room at Dude that's hilarious. Every mom at that basketball game we like oh, well there's two women that found him attractive enough to hook up with him. You know, the the pervert one yesterday like, okay, that's all there is to it. This happened to me today. Oh, I went to which one of them timely No, no no no was the target one? I set that up poorly. Let me transition differently. Let me introduce a new subject matter. Yes, today Yes, I went to Publix to get a sandwich at the deli counter. There is a person in front of me who orders sandwich and you know what his order was? Whatever the person making the sandwich favorite order was. Wow. Oh for lunch. It is crazy in such a jerk move. Yeah, I mean no heat. So the guy making the sandwich says what kind of sandwich do you want? And he says, I want the sandwich that you would make for yourself. If you were making a sandwich. Right? And I bet you're hungry. Okay, lunchtime and your sandwich that you want but then have to give it to me. And see. unrelated now I'm thinking it's the jerky thing to do. I'm not sure it's a jerky thing. Because the guy I mean, I I've seen it where like, masquerade you asked a waiter or waitress like jerky his thing to do if you if too far too far. If you asked a waiter or a waitress, like what do you like to eat? is essentially what the guy's asking. Totally different. Because if you say I think it's what about this though, Jamie? Because now this is Wouldn't that be something? I feel like that's something you would do. You know, like, listen as a straight man. That's something I would do with the woman like flirting. Right where you're having. Okay, well, like oh, like, like, yeah, like you want a conversation. So you go, what do you like here? And she's like, well, I like this thing I do with like Turkey, but I put some hot pepper on it. You know, whatever, your favorite things. That's right. That seems like so that's like a weird thing for it almost seems like was it? It just seems like a weird thing to do not. I'm not saying that. It's okay. I don't know. That just seems like a weird thing. Yeah, well, let me add additional detail. Okay, the person ordering the sandwich was a guy on his break from that store. He's now saying to a co worker, make me the sandwich that you would make yourself? No. And I thought it was like a super aggressive kind of power play. Oh, like, yeah, make me your sandwich. And I thought if I was the sandwich guy, I would think I'm gonna make you the worst sandwich ever. Yeah. Everybody like all of them. baloney. Yeah. This is something different. Actually. I think that that the supervisor was there. The one person making the sandwich said to his buddy, go around and tell me to order that sandwich that I do really well, so that they could then make the perfect sandwich in front of their supervisor. So they would do I was actually the person at the store. And if that had been part of the story, I would have included it. This was to like a true lawyer. No, no, I had everything clock. Yeah, this guy shows up. And he basically says, make me your sandwich. Right. And I was thinking I'd be frustrated the guy on the other side of the counter. He's like, do you want Turkey? Do you wanna know why? He's like, make me what you would make? I should have your sandwich. I shall have your favorite sandwich. You shall give me your sandwich. Yes. What do you love? I shall take that from you. So now, later today, my the guy who cuts my hair was unavailable. I went in to get my haircut. appointment. I don't make an appointment. Okay. I'm kind of an on the fly. Today's the day. Okay, this is gonna happen. Okay. He's apparently out of town for six weeks. it's problematic. Yeah. I need a haircut sooner than six weeks. Yeah. So the woman who's now work in the counter says, aka to her. So I kind of got hecka bullied. Okay. Yeah. And then you said you do whatever you like to your favorite haircut. I actually had a moment where I thought if you wanted to find me appealing, how would you cut my hair? No, but I did think of it relative to this guy. Did you ask her to make a sandwich? No. How do you think I'd look at how do you think my hair should look? And I realized that's such a highly specific request. So gross, right? Yeah, to be like, I know this works for one person. Oh, nor is it kind of like the sandwich guy knew like, you know what? I'm gonna give you the worst haircut ever. If cuz you're gonna That kind of nonsense. I go to school I went to school in DC went to a an old classic barber shop like the Italian barber shop and there's five chairs, right in the in this barber shop. And you know, men just you'd come in and you'd sit down. And what I always loved was, there was the barber that no one liked. And that barber would always you just go next man up, and the next man up would get up there. And he would always be like, next man up and everyone would be like, I'm gonna wait for Julia. Wait for him. Hey, Paul. We're gonna be back with more of the podcast right after this. Our guest this evening, Paul virzi more after this. What's your favorite kind of cereal? I'm a frosted flakes. Writer, writer. Rihanna. I have got a seasonal cereal. Here. peeps. Cereal is only available during Easter. I look like a psychopath. Because I buy literally dozens of boxes of peep cereal. Let me Is it like a Easter version of a different cereal? No, it's just peeps zero you can only get at Easter. It's a purchase that I purchase dozens of boxes every year and it lasts me through the year. Okay. I don't know what peeps are made out of but give it exposure to air for any length of time. It is super bricky Do you know that they have now created they've gone way too far with the flavors. They have fruit punch peeps that have root beer peeps they have every flavor you can think of no pizza tastes like marshmallow. And that's it with a little sugar. But yeah. pancake and syrup. And you know, it didn't taste like decades or sir. Oh, we're talking about cereal? We started talking about sir. So what's your favorite cereal? And I didn't know he did. Okay. He said life. Did I ever episode yet to be heard? And I remembered it. Because the conversation was earlier this evening. We're recording this now. I mean, I know I'm bending the time space continue. You can't change your answer in the past. From what I would have said was here. Yeah. All right. Welcome back to the broadcast. I'm Jamie bendele. Jamie, Hernan, Adam. Right back, swinging for the fences. And it's good, good, good, good. Hey, love that. Paul virzi is our guest today, Paul, it's great to have you we want to talk about in this segment is the concept of a meet. And three, you've spent a number of years out on the road as a comedian, you're surely had the opportunity to eat in a cafeteria style restaurant where meat and three is the format true? Yes. Okay. Now, in our discussion of this, here's how we utilize the concept in your life, what is the meat? What is the organizing principle around which everything else is organized? I guess I would have to say, you know, family because as a, you know, as a young comic, you know, I was one of the, you could ask all my friends. And the funny thing is, a lot of my friends in this business are anywhere from like, you know, five, six, up to 11 years older than me, and they were like, Man, you did it early. So not having a family wasn't anything that I was gonna do like having a family. I was probably even too naive. I'm like, I'm gonna be a comedian that successful and have a family and start that in my 20s. And I didn't realize but like that was always a thing. So I would say the meat is definitely my family. And my my home base and my my personal life the stability in my family and personal life. I would think that and then everything else when the answer we don't accept it new meet. families, families as is that alone can't can't do. All right. All right. Hold on a second, Paul. It's like saying you can't order chicken. Yeah. When did you have that? You can't have you know, like, you go into a meeting three. They're gonna have every time for you. meatloaf. No. Why? Because meatloaf is family. That's all we have. It's an organizing principle around Oh, we can go he's now they're basically saying you're not allowed to do that. No, he's sitting there in his 11 year olds room looking at a stormtrooper helmet knowing that he has to say family or or else they're going to say, You didn't say family. Are you going? I'm giving you a free pass. Just wipe out this family stuff. So backup, and just give it give the give you real answers to stuff. Well, first of all, I don't think my 11 year old and nine year old is going to listen to this podcast you Paul. the only the only one. I mean, the only one thing I'm pretty good at SEO. That's That's you. I was going to say the only way this comes up conversationally is someday Paul is on his deathbed child comes with a confession and says I was trying to gather all of the content that you created over the years, and I found this random episode from a bobcat. asked, said, family. Family, please. Well, when you guys ask that question, you guys have this segment a lot. You ask that question to a lot of people we get every show. Right? And, you know, family is a common one or not a common no family. It's all over the board. It's all over the board. Sometimes a good one. We bleep out. If you say family, it's already been bleeped out. It has not been believed out families a great answer. I don't feel it was under duress because he's in his son's room or anything. Hold on a second. Let me just clarify for the person who's just picking up where we are in the episode. Yes, right now, at this moment, yes. Jamie? is making fun of LeBron. I guessed wrong. He is getting lover on a hard time. Yeah. And the rest of the turtle. Oh, my goodness. Oh. That is so true. Yeah. That is so true. And also affects a bunch of editing decisions. I'm sticking with it. Double Down. So then, out of that, when when you hear this episode, and I hope you do listen to the episode, the answer to that question may not sound exactly like your voice. It'll be fairly close. Family, but go ahead. Okay, so now what's no so we have family. Here's the other part. The second part of that question, what's your three? What are the three attributes that you would like people to most closely associate with you? And oh my god, if you say loyal, Ah, man, that's tough. Dude. It's like, you know, I'm, in all seriousness, like, I was just talking about this with a couple comedian, friends of mine, like, I have a different approach. But as you guys know, man, we're in a time right now, where and I hate to say this, because it's even some of my peers. But there's a desperation amongst entertainers and comedians right now. That is ridiculous. And when I say it, I mean, some of the things people are willing to do to get followers, what they're willing to say, what they're willing to wear, like, all kinds of like, just wild shit, that you're just like, dude, you know, like, your family's gonna see this one day. Or, you know, I just always look at like, how when, you know, Jamie just said something like, when you're later on in life, like our kids will listen to what we do you know what I mean? And I have friends that are doing shit. Like I said, putting on, you know, makeup and running out and doing man on the street, anything to get, like, more followers. So I guess one thing that I always want to be associated with is like, there's just certain things that I'm just not going to do for for that. So I guess there's, I guess you could say like, maybe like a, I know this is gonna sound might sound corny, but like a realness or a genuine that because like, I'm not doing even during this pandemic, and some of these comedians stand on the back of pickup trucks, you know, with like, a karaoke machine that they got at a toy store, they're yelling at strangers walking by, I had, you know, rooftop shows some things that I just, you know, now I got friends who were standing in plexi glass boxes, like a human fish tank, telling jokes, and they're putting pictures on Instagram and shit. I'm not doing that. So, for me, I would say people know that I definitely have a self worth and kind of a genuine thing, which is something that you know, a lot of my fans a fan of mine sent me these custom made Jordan custom made Adidas sneakers. And it was like, he put my name on it and he did all this kind of brush spray all this cool stuff. And one thing that says in the back of it is stick to your guns. So for me I think that's definitely that's definitely one of them. And I know I'm giving you guys answers that you don't want. We do one Yeah. Alright, so the other two man I guess a good time man. I'm uh you know I'm a very you know, I'm a lead Jamie you know when we go on the road and we go out there cigars sporting event, you know, don't get me wrong. I mean, I'll do a couple of Bourbons anytime I can. So I definitely loved that part of you know, I guess a little different than in the family part. But yeah, I have that. Sure. Now we're getting the truth. Oh, man. Um, I like to go to department store parking lot three o'clock preferably cold I'm not into self reflection what you want people to associate with third one oh my god third one dude. I guess I you know, you throw me cuz you said the loyalty thing I guess like my I guess like we're held on a second Yeah, you want soup? You looking at soup? He's Captain attitude. Tonight in the episode if you know if loyalty is an attribute that you feel like, that's something that's important to me and I want people when they go listen for his for all of his merits and all of his faults. Paul was a loyal guy, and Trudeau stuck to his guns. So we got a fun guy, we got a guy who doesn't sell out as a result of desperation. Jamie's got that down just because we're, we're 15 straight episodes with a loyalty answer. So come on. Well, I think, I think, yeah, I guess I guess, I guess this falls under looking. But I would say like, if I say it, like, you know, for example, I work, Jamie, I work at the punch line, right? I love working at the punch line, you guys have worked to me there from a young comic to now. Now that I'm kind of, you know, I'm moving up in the ranks of comedy after years of headlining, and let's say somebody, some hot shot goes into Atlanta, and says, I want you to do in my club and this and that, that just won't happen. So, you know, that? I mean, depending on what they offer me, we'd have to call. So here's the table. And so you raise a good point. And I know that it's it is an interesting one. I, you, I would like to think that our relationship is separate and distinct. personal relationship is separate and distinct from a professional relationship. Yes. Is that what a boss says to someone right before they fire them? No. But my point is, is that I know that at the end of the day, you go back to your house, you have responsibilities to your wife and your children. And if you were to say, so listen, I got two offers for Atlanta today. One is at the punch line, and one is x plus whatever, at some other place. And if for whatever reason, that wasn't something that I could do, because because the business part of it doesn't work for me, I will get you the best of luck in your success at that x plus, because that's the way life works. Right. Right. And that's why you know, are you trying to slip in a loyalty answer also? No, I'm just saying that I think that there. No, I do think that there's something to be I think what loyalty is undervalued in and in betrayal? is not what people often make it out to be alright, for my children who someday are listening to this. I agree. loyalty is important and underrated. For the purposes of this episode. I will say that I believe that that Paul's answer of semi loyalty is far more interesting than loyalty. So my loyalty is really just don't forget your roots. Right? Like, don't forget the Jamie's of the world who helped you out when you were when you were coming? Oh, yeah. And what you what I would do is, and I appreciate what you said, but what I would do is, and Jamie would expect to listen, there's a lot of people out there that would go, you know, and some probably some of the same people were talking about, about this desperation. Like you said, like, you know, a tick tock video in a song jumping into a pool, saying, Hey, I'm going to be in Omaha this week, or whatever they're doing. Now, God bless them for doing that. But I don't necessarily think that that person would even think twice, or some of those people would and I should say, I don't want to judge anybody. I don't know. But with me, I would call Jamie and I would go Hey, Jamie, look, here's the deal, man. You know, you and Chris have been great to me. This guy's opening up a place. He offered me whatever. I just want you to know that I'm not going to and then if we talked about and he goes Listen, go and do that. We'll try to work something out. But the the idea of me just running to do that and him finding out through like social media tweets, and like just that will just never happen. You're never perfect. All right, that's a great close to meet. And three. We are going to be back with a lightning round guest this evening, Paul virzi. Soon to be apparently playing an alternate comedy club. We'll be back with more on the podcast right after this. Alright, so before we go back to the guest. What's going on? Yeah, I mean, the attack of family the attack of wasn't attacking family. I was attacking family as an answer, because it's the most obvious meat answer. And I wanted to create a little tension because if you read podcasts in one on one, it says make sure there's tension first off guests take fight with guests first. I didn't realize there was a podcast one on one but we all know that and I haven't seen it yet. That's for sure. Oh, so now it's not just good, but you're also gonna attack me podcast 102 is pick fight with other people. Yeah, what you want is boiler want to go there? We can do this all night. Yeah, this would be great. Okay, so you go on Amazon. And you search books who you think you are coming into that me like that? You kind of Amazon and just search but oh, I've read podcast 101 I'm a big deal gathering you do? Because you're reading podcasts to say to me don't don't read self published. Just fucking talent. All right, welcome back. This is a lightning round segment here on the vodcast Jamie bendele Jamie Hernan Adam Get the top eight. Okay, that's really but down a little bit but anyhow, the sheep love this segment I see him jumping up and down in the field. They're getting excited. It's time for the lightning round. Alright so unlike me and three Paul, this is the opposite. These are deep questions. But we are looking for brief answers. Okay, guest gets the choice of going clockwise or counterclockwise. Be careful here. I will clockwise, clockwise there it is. All right, starting with Jamie. Hernan, Paul, which animal would make the best sidekick in an action movie? A white tiger. Paul, is there a god? Yes. Have you ever thought you're going to die? Yes. Alright, so you come upon a super content grizzly bear. And he is content because he is watching a circus bear juggling. All right. And they are exactly equidistant to you. And your position. Which one kills you first and how? That's easy, because I know about grizzly bears. So the one that's going to kill me is going to be the one that's juggling. Call. Best TV dad of all time. Allen sick and growing pains. Well done, sir. How did you get your best scar? a skateboard accident? You are putting together a basketball team with five different animals. Which animals do you choose? I would choose a giraffe. I would choose an ostrich. I would choose a gorilla. I would choose a Oh my god. Hold on here. Yeah. We're really going through the jungle the thinking that I'm gonna who's gonna Alright, we got the rebound. Who's gonna run the point? I would say yeah, grizzly bears. They could go up to eight feet and then maybe a chimp best cereal healthy and sugar. It's got to be one cereal or two. Okay, Jamie's giving me a hard time because it's lightning round. So best cereal go life. Oh, you got a little bit of that so well, because it's kind of a sugar kind of a healthy. Sugar healthy. Well done, sir. All right. Am I the finalize closes the lightning round closing the grand finale if you will. All right. You know what I gotta say something. This is amazing. Actually. It's like a really good. I love the second book. Oh, thank you. All right. You can wear only one home or away uniform. away. I think that's a good call. That's a good call. Yeah, I like that because they usually ask for the names on the jersey when they're away. Anyhow, first of all, as a me know that as a New York football Giants fan. That wipes away that actually says giants across the helmet is I think one of the best uniforms in all the sports so I would and I love the white away too. So I would definitely do that. Paul, you find yourself parachuting out of an airplane tandem with an animal which animal would you prefer that to be the lightning round? over? Oh, that way if I if I jumped out of a plane and I have to be accompanied by an animal right tandem, okay, no. So let's clean up the question. Okay, one Have you ever done skydiving? No. Are you wanted to and then I completely lost my nerve and I have zero desire. Okay, now, when you skydive, you are going to tandem skydive. Which means you're going to have a companion with you. Oh my god. lightning round. Oh, well, it wasn't because it's bonus round. Wait a minute. You mean this thing is strapped to me grass. Okay, now something is strapped to you? What do you want strapped to you plummeting towards the earth. And by the way, you also have to count on an animal to have some sense of self preservation so that it will also pull the chute. I have the right answer to this. But go ahead and give me your answer. I think Listen, I was thinking of all kinds of other animals, but I think a dog and the reason why I say a dog is because I think that since dogs have good senses of what's going on, and especially with humans. I think as we got closer to the ground, and we slowed down, and we were going I think it was start to realize we were getting closer and feel my energy and hopefully be like, you know, either that or I mean just start running and rip me apart. So I mean, but i think i think i would say a dog. No, no, not important. I wrote down the correct answer before you answered. And I'm going to go now show my piece of paper to Jamie. What does it say right there if Doug Yep, it says dog. You're exactly right. Oh, yes. Yeah. So yes, I have. I have this notion in my head. So I have two dogs. Dogs is the greatest dog in America, right? best dog in America. That dog is going to we're going to go out. It's going to sense the situation. It's going to say, I have a job here. I'm going to do my job. That dog would have piloted the plane. He's checked the shoots. He's checked everything. He's already got up. Shoot. It's got a I'm assuming it's a pull cord or something. Yeah, that sounds like a POM mitten. He's laying it just this guy. We got this stretch out there. And the other dog who is the worst dog in America, I'm gonna be plummeting to Earth going. Who's a good boy? Who's? Yeah. The dogs gonna be calmer than you. Yeah, absolutely. Right. Yeah. All right. So let's come back. We'll do a quick wrap segment. That's a lightning round with a bonus question. I'm glad that we have some unanimity. Personally, there was a right where there was a wrong answer. And yeah, we got it. Yeah. But anyway, well, it's time to shoot on his feet. You're fine. Okay. here's, here's the alternative way of asking that question. If you had to choose one animal to be strapped to the back of tandem parachuting, which one would it be? Oh, no. Think about that. Have a break. We'll come back. We'll think about it. Oh, yeah. All right. podcast. We'll be back after this guest Paul. Alright, so I'm never going. Why not? Not anything that's on my bucket list. And I have two great respect for Graham. Okay, I think the three of us should go skydiving tandem. What do you think about triple Decker, triple Decker would actually be a flawed jump. Because we would still need one guy to run parachute. Okay. Let me ask you the question. You have just raised the subject. I am a slice of bread in the vodcast sandwich. Oh, me too. I am not in the middle of you. You created I think you volunteered to be in the middle. No, I didn't. I didn't volunteer to be in the middle. Yeah, yeah. But you by creating Actually, there are only two slices of the sandwich. It is first person and guy with parachute. And I can't be guy with parachute. I am first slice. You just said you don't want to go. So that means you can be middle because you just want to come last middle? No, no, I'm there against my will. I'm front slice. Now. You're seeing everything? No, you guys are both middle slices before in the back seat. And that's our parachute. Home seat. Alright, let me ask you this question in that scenario, is it slice in the front slice with a parachute? Double meat? Or is it slice meat? slice? I'm happy to answer that question. If you will just not use meat as the reference. You have volunteered to be the meat in the meat sandwich, which is a quad jump. First of all, excellent harmony there. What you just said. And second of all, I called Dibs. I'm outside your middle. You didn't call dibs. No, no, no, no. literally sitting on my home. No, Jamie. I came in both doors. No. No, the boy Yeah. Brian the home kid. Okay. I think we work that out. outside. I really worked on anything. All right. All right. Welcome back to the podcast. I think we have time for one more segment here with our guest Paul virzi. You're excited about the dates that you've got upcoming this year. You got it you got a full calendar planned. Well yeah, we got a bunch of stuff now and a bunch of stuff coming in. So going to Florida tomorrow and then you know a bunch of stuff. Austin Salt Lake City, doing my first theater this year and did the wielder in Boston this fall? Nice. So yeah, yeah, it's good, man. You can whisper that you're in Atlanta went Hey, listen, I'm gonna scream that from a mountaintop. Yeah, the Laugh Factory. Coming our place into competition has been a bad you what you want to do you want to make a left at the diner for the new place. You're using my place as a direction. Conveniently located one mile from the punchline. I don't want to leave the sheep hanging though. We had a great end of the last segment and I'm concerned about the tandem animal would you Like to be attached to question. I think it was a good one and I don't want to leave it. Oh, I would pick something without claws. You're attached to it. Yeah, it's it's probably not gonna be able to get you because you're on its back. I don't want a panicking animal. Okay, okay, bear I want something possibly dumb like what about like a slot? I would know you need something big with math I would do like a like a big pick, like a big pick like one of those are like a boar or like just a big, just, you know, those big fat pigs sit there like I would be strapped to that because if it goes down, it's really not fast. It's gonna probably absorb your fall. Yeah. And they don't really have there's no claws. There's no real. So I would do that gray whale. You could just plummet straight down and you just kind of bounce up. No, no. Yeah, I wouldn't be fearful there wouldn't be enough. Shoot. And how do you get a great wheel on a plane? Yeah, it's a big Yeah, yeah. This is really tough. We're dealing with here. We're not gonna be able to get away or asking Wayne hypothetical question. I'm trying to figure out if this ever comes up in my life, and they asked me Which animal I want to know the gray whale the problem with the gray whale. I think we have inadvertently invented the world's greatest eight year old birthday party. We are doing combo petting zoo. And parachute. Let's do it right now. The elephant. Yeah, how come none of us said elephant. I don't. I don't trust again, elephant in Cessna. seems very sketchy. I think a whale is perfect. But the problem with the gray whale is that you will survive the initial fall. But then you will bounce off the gray whale back up way high and will not survive that fall. You're assuming a lot of stuff. One, you can get the gray whale on the plane to the water it can get on the plane three, that the chute doesn't open and you have to rely The only reason you're picking an animal so you can get a good bounce. That's not the right answer. But I am worried about the here's here's the other issue with your choice. I'm not really good at science concepts. But I'm going to suggest that at some point you go into a weird somersault barrel roll because of the mismatch of your Miss match of your masses. And you take a 5050 chance that you're going to wind up on the bottom side oh well sandwich is crying out Yeah. And and is the shoot even support that the only thing the only question I think any of us shoot the only So again, the videos I've watched of people tandem parachute jumping, you have one job as the little spoon, okay, and that is get your feet up when the ground shows up. Right? your only job is to tuck the knees and let the actual person behind you land this thing right so I think when it comes time to be tandem attached and your big spoon Oh, it's only animals with hips. Fuck, I don't know. I don't want I don't imagine trying to get that whale to kick. All right. This is gonna be a blubber explosion, and you're gonna come flying. Oh my god. The farmer comes out. Here blowhole that's blowing snow goggles trying to get out to read your altimeter. Good luck. Yeah, yeah. All right. All right. So online. We've got the podcasts verzi effect and the new one. Which is blowing up it's, it's a great lesson. Yeah, versus the effect anything better. We're Bilborough got the YouTube channel, which you guys could subscribe to. And yeah, I'm gonna be if you go to Paul virzi comm you could get all my dates, side splitters and tempo this week, then I'm going to be in Austin in June, Salt Lake City in June and like I said, dates are coming in. So Paul virzi.com will have all of the the ticket links are available right now. And hopefully, hopefully, Atlanta, Georgia will be on there real soon. Atlanta will be on there. Whether it's our place or the new place. real soon. All right. It's always good to talk to you, my friend continued success. We'll keep in touch about the NBA Playoffs this year hawks, Knicks, and always, always a pleasure, man. Good luck with the with the Hawks. Hopefully you guys are gonna need it. And listen, that lightning round was so fun. If anybody ever dropped out. They hit me up now doing good. Thanks, Paul. All right, that was Paul virzi. Comedian, terrific guy. Always great to have somebody who brings the heat. Remember to Like, Subscribe, share our episodes. The only way the flock works is this the flock gets bigger. After every completed episode. We have finished another one here. This is the podcast. The sheep are dismissed for Jamie, Jamie and Adam. I can talk Fires getting low. This episode of the bug cast is over. Dumb the gold now she goes back to where you came from. We'll call you back. It's time for another mock house, aka duck.